At this moment. I love my family. I love Christmas. I love pure white snow. I love music. I love drawing. I love my friends. I love warm glögi and tea. I think people have many things they should feel grateful for~ Sometimes we aren't grateful enough. We think because it exists, it exists. If we learn to love something, when we lose that thing, it's more painful. I haven't lost anything...at least lately...I think. But sometimes I'm scared to lose things that are important, so scared that I can't hold them tight enough. I thought if I don't appreciate some things enough it'll be easier to let go, when that time comes. But as I grew older I knew I was wrong.
"Don't be sad, because it didn't continue, but be happy, because it happened."
Remember it. Don't lose yourself to your feelings, even if something is hard, you will get over it. This is how we, humans were designed.
Right now listening Yoseop Yang's Caffeine. Before I didn't like Yoseop that much, eventhough I listened B2ST, I don't know why I didn't like him much...just that feeling...I guess you could say first impression. But now I got better feeling about this song. It's same with idols and "normal" people. I always get first impression from people that tell me whether I think I like or don't like that person. I guess everyone gets these feelings. But I always hope if I get "bad" first impression of someone, that I could learn to like those people later on...that I could see "oh, I was wrong" and that person really is a good person. But sometimes when I think someone is a good person, later on I'll find out that person isn't as nice as I thought she or he would be. That's a naive part of me, I don't always see people's intentions. But I don't like to be cynical...I'd rather realize later "oh I was wrong again", "well time to move on".
I thought maybe spending time here, at my hometown, for whole vacation will be waste of time...just few days will be enough. I was wrong. My heart and brain tells me now that I need to be grateful for every moment I can spend with my family. You never know what will happen. So I gave it a thought and this vacation became a lot better. It's all about attitude. If you choose to think everything sucks, then everything will suck.
So It's Wednesday, I still have some days left before going back to school. I think I wanted to spend this vacation more creatively, but I ended up doing things I do pretty often. But I don't regret, not at all and sometimes creativity cannot be forced. So what did I do after my last day on my on-the-job-practising?
On Saturday I went to Manga day (at work, at Comic Center), which went pretty good. ^^ ...now I miss people from work. But I was glad that people wanted me to go to see them later on. Some people asked to see me later, I think I made some new friends, makes me happy. ^^ Then after that I took a train and came to my hometown.
On Sunday I went to see my friend, Hanna. I really like her as my friend, I never feel bored with her and I can forget everything else for a while. This time we went to her place and played Tekken for hours and talked at the same time...it was really fun and refreshing! My thumbs hurted because of playing, haha, but I felt very happy.
These days I also
- went to a big shopping mall with my little brother
- saw my Dad after a long time
- helped my little brother with his homework
- made first time ever ice cream by myself (Christmas ice cream...kekeke~ my Mom and brother liked it ^^)
- drew Himchan...well it's not that good, but I want to learn to draw people better
- also made another Christmas pop-up card~
- watched TV
- watched dramas from internet...Missing you and Full House 2 ...oh and also Kpop Star season 2. ^^ Very good~ and talented people~
- took photos of my brother
I'm probably still going to make cards, go to Christmas market (hmmh I don't know whether I should call it market or market fair or bazaar or something else O_o) and play Wii~
OH AND ABSOLUTELY!! I'm gonna watch MAMA AWARDS 2012 and I believe B.A.P will win Rookie Award 2012...at least I really hope so. ^^ They really would deserve it.
Btw. These days I really enjoy Epik High's music~ old and new songs, lyrics, singing and rap parts~ :3
- YUN -